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The Attack of the Claymates

posted by DL Byron on January 10, 2005

Andy Kaufman In response to several different blogs/bloggers taking themselves way to seriously (A nice holiday “fuck you” from Winer was one of them), Eric Rice and I were chatting about how the blogosphere needs an Andy Kaufman blogger, like what Andy did with wrestling, as the world’s first Inter-Gender Wrestling Champion. By chance, in a completely unrelated conversation, Manis wrote me to tell me about the funniest example of comment flooding he’d ever seen. If Andy Kaufman were to blog, I think this would be it. And, what’s really interesting about this is that I’d never paid attention to Clay Aiken until the Wonkette post on how Clay hates children and is mean to them. Here’s the background from Manis:

Will Carroll is a baseball writer specializing in baseball statistical analysis. He applies statistical theory to performance stats to evaluate major league baseball players. A rather dry subject sometimes, but Will and his contributors are sharp, funny guys who liven up their posts with some well-placed wise cracks. When one blog contributor dropped a throwaway line about the size of singer Clay Aiken’s penis, he doomed the blog to an attack of “Claymate” comment flooding.

The first several comments are from humorously humorless “Claymates” (their own term) who accuse the author of coveting Clay’s (they almost always refer to him by his first name only) size and of invoking Clay’s name to drive hits to the author’s website. But then the Claymates start to fight amongst themselves like the Orcs of Isengard and the Orici of Mordor in The Two Towers

Nasty Isengard Orc guard: “He’s a Christian man! How dare you soil his name!”
Brutish Mordor Orici captain: “Man of God or not, he’s got a huge dick!”

It’s surreal. If not Sublime. The Attack of the Claymates or When Claymates Attack.


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